Casino Royale (2006)

Well it’s been four years since…the film that must never be named again…and the franchise needs reinventing. Any ideas? What’s that from the back? Go back to the formula that films like You only Live Twice and The Spy Who Loved me Perfected? Nah that’s silly, how about, now hear me out here, we go all the way back? Lets tell the story from the beginning with a fresh young Bond, someone pretty obscure err…Oh! I know that guy from a Kid in King Arthur’s Court! Daniel Craig Yeah he’ll do! Lets tell the story right from the beginning, Casino Royale, what could possibly go wrong?…..

The film revolves around Bond getting his licence to kill and then being sent to investigate terrorist’s banker Le Chiffre (Played by Mads Mikkelsen) as he attempts to recompense for some African guy’s lost money (pftthh a banker loosing someone’s money, yeah really realistic guys) in a high stakes poker game which Bond infiltrates with the help of the beautiful Vesper Lynd (Played by Eva Green) whom he woos, falls in love with and eventually arranges to marry.

I don’t like this film and there are two major reasons for this. Firstly, I don’t like Daniel Craig as Bond. I think he looses some of the charisma of the other Bonds and, whilst I do think him to be dark, I think it could’ve been done much better. The writing for the story and development of the character was quite good but I think that they could’ve and should’ve gotten a better guy for the job. Secondly, I’m all in favour of telling the story of how Bond began but  this was riddled, and I mean RIDDLED, with plot points. Your setting this film all the way back at the beginning, before Dr No and yet we have modern-day equipment, a tracking device, the newest Walther (Bond was using a FU$%ING BERRETTA BEFORE Dr No!!). It irritates me that they set it in the present day and yet before Dr No. This means that Judi Dench was M, then left and was replaced by Bernard Lee only to return for Goldeneye. IT MAKES NO SENSE!!!  Don’t even get me started on the distinct lack of Q!This monumental and completely deliberate fuck up means that Casino Royale is the leading argument used by those arguing the James Bond codename theory, which I hate!!! The acting, however, is alright though I still don’t like Craig. Le Chiffre is a nice villain, being a mathematical chess prodigy and crying tears of blood really helps. Vesper’s a good Bond girl and it is nice to sort of be given the reason why Bond is such a cold-hearted killer at times. He loved Vesper, in fact they were engaged. Vespers’s betrayal and eventual death cause Bond to lose heart and faith in humanity, which would have been good if it were done properly. I still like it but it pisses me off that it wasn’t done better. The actions good, especially the scenes in Africa. Frankly I liked the balance between  action and card games.. The car flip stunt things pretty awesome and the torture scene is chilling, dark and funny at the same time “You’re gonna die scratching my balls!” lolz all round me thinks. We also get Felix Leiter whose suddenly become black…hey it happens…Finally the song. You know my name is without a shadow of a doubt one of my favourite Bond songs. Now, I’m gonna admit when I saw the film I didn’t like the song. Now I love it, in fact I’m listening to it right now…Oh no wait, it’s just ended now I’m listening to Waterloo…

A perfect example of a film that could’ve been great but instead decided to set things in the present day and yet still before Dr No, fuelling a theory which I hate. Mediocre Bond, good villain, good Bond girl, great action, fucking awesome song



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