Why the Captains of Star Trek should be arrested for neglect


Ahhh Star Trek, that age-old show that helped define a genre. It had memorable character, memorable lines, memorable scenes and memorable visuals. The Captains always stood at the bridge, they made all the big decisions that gave the rest of the crew to move on and to fulfill their duty to the Federation. To go boldly where no man has ever gone before. Surely this group of elite commanding officers are the best of men, women, Vulcan, Klingon and George Takei?

OR ARE THEY!!!????!!!???

Well, let’s think about this. The ships involved in Star Trek are assigned with the mission of exploration, they are there to find new species and planets and to expand the Federation and this is by no means a short task. This is a longtime committment. This explains why there are children onboard. The kids are those of the crew members, what else are they gonna do with them, just leave them on Earth while their parents are millions of miles away? Ok so what if there are kids onboard? Granted both Enterprise and Voyager get pretty beaten up at times but surely Kirk, Picard, Janeway and… the other 2…Would go out of their way to ensure that they are kept safe and out of harms way?

No, not at all.

Firstly, these are the Enterprise and the Voyager, effectively the flagships of the Federation. They don’t just get a little beaten up, they attract danger. They’re obvious targets for attack. Everybody from the Klingons to space pirates has probably had a pop at these things. Secondly, the children are constantly in danger, they are being taken to the edges of the universe, chances are there’s gonna be something bad. There are episodes centred around these kids being put in danger, one has a kids imaginary friend being a psychotic alien, another has a different psychotic alien masquerading as some boy’s dead mother in another a bunch of kids get kidnapped by aliens. In another, a tour group of kids almost gets killed when the ship malfunctions.These kids aren’t safe. Furthermore, half the enemies that the crew come across don’t care if they kill children. The Borg are a pretty big name in the series and they have no consciences whatsoever. They don’t mind killing children and yet the Voyager is actually sent out to attack them. The Captains never even mention or consider the children’s safety when the ship is under attack. Not once! These captains may be good at their job but never leave them with kids, they’ll probably end up dead or seriously injured. Hell Kirk was probably too busy with his green-skinned floozies…

WON’T SOMEBODY PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN!!!???

Benny4700

10 thoughts on “Why the Captains of Star Trek should be arrested for neglect

    1. JJJJJaneway, as you describe her, hasn’t had a decent song made after him… I think it was ‘What Would Captain Picard Do’ by Hank Green… Great song!

      Like

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